The funny thing is that I post about my tri training but not the long road to the dissertation. Oh, let's see if I can.....

Today started out with lab chores. All the little things that must be done before I can run another round of digestions. Wash tubes, soak them in detergent for 24 hours, scrub tubes, rinse tubes, put tubes in acid, boil the acid, let sit overnight....very hum drum boring stuff. Oh yeah, and rinse all the beakers that were in the boiling acid over the weekend. Yippee-freaking-dooo. However, there is no lab mom to do this stuff. Gotta pull my weight.

After that thrilling start, I wrote a list of things to do. They include making final edits to my time limit appeal letter. They cannot be made until I hear from my advisor. So, that will remain unchecked. The next big item was "Finish Proposal". I've been trying to check off "Finish Proposal" for weeks now. Today I tried the "break it down into little pieces" strategy. Things like "Add new references" and "update reference section" were marked off. Next I'm on to "Reorganize Background", "Edit Objectives" and "Enhance Statistics"

Isn't this thrilling? That's why I don't write about it too much. Guess it's not any worse than saying I swam 6, 4X100 drills with 30 sec RI at the pool. Be it triathlon or dissertations, the day to day grind, weekly workouts that add stamina and dimension to the big event. I guess each one deserves their own blog time.

My plan to run at the gym was foiled when I forgot my purse at the house. Gotta have a student ID to use the gym. All I have are my car keys. SIGH. Still, I don't need no stinking treadmill, all I need are 30 minutes without lightning. The radar showed a break in the weather and I went for it. Woohoo!

The new shoes are GREAT! The old ones were pretty worn out but only now do I realize HOW worn out.

No swim because I need the student ID for that as well, however, I'll take what I have.

Even the best training plans bend to mother nature.

Rain. Lots of it arrived early this morning. And not winter rain. Dropping lightning bolts like hot potatoes rain. Every 30 seconds. That means to run this morning and probably no pool this afternoon. Bummer. Maybe I'll head over to the gym for a run on the new treadmills and a few weights. The rain has mellowed on the lightning scale but the pool won't open if they can hear thunder. Which I can so I imagine they can as well.

Did I mention the rain should last 2 days? If it stays this mellow, I may venture a ride tomorrow even if it rains. Think mellow rain.

Let's take a moment to remember all the soldiers who gave their lives in the service of their country.

Very few cars were on the road today. Fewer than a Sunday morning. Today's ride was a multitask event. I needed to do 5 minutes worth of work in the lab. It would take 30 minutes round trip to drive to the university. It takes about 45 minutes to ride. What better way to get to school than a super easy ride? This is a little longer than the scheduled ride but at 11mph, I wasn't too worried. The road into the university has LOTS of stoplights making it difficult to get up to speed, anyway.

Because Memorial Day is observed by the university, the pool is closed. No chance to swim today. Rather than move the workout elsewhere, I will add 250yd to the other 2 swims scheduled for this week. I'm scheduled to swim again tomorrow.

Nine.

One "placeholder" long run makes nine workouts for this week. Yeah! I call it a placeholder long run because it wasn't any longer than any other runs. It will be but for now it's holding the place for the second long workout of the weekend. Truth be told, it was a walk 10-run 10-walk 10 workout. Running was my sport before I entered the world of triathlon, however, it is a weak link. Even though my adult incarnation as a runner began in 1999, I'm very prone to injury in this event. Too many miles too quickly guarantees that I'll have shin splints or knee problems. Regular strength training does help but I still must be careful. In a week where I added 4 new workouts, it seemed wise to hold back on the run. Next week I'll walk 10-run 20-walk 10. Eventually I'll drop the walking an incorporate more running until I work up to an hour of running.

Strength training is in the future but it will wait a month until the 9 workout/week schedule has been solidified. For now the focus is making all 9 workouts and adding time to the weekend long workouts.

The birthday passed very happily. Because my birthday always falls on Memorial Day weekend, it's rare that I celebrate my birthday on THE day. Everyone has BBQs, reunions, graduation parties, blah, blah, blah. This year is the same with a major exeption. Many friends did little things to make it a special day. My lab mate surprised me with a birthday cake. When I headed to work, my boss threw a mini sushi party in honor of the day. Friends who saw me at dinner bought the table a round of drinks. Little things made the day special, even if there was no big party. Very very cool.

Let me give a shout out to the Tribe members who should be in New Orleans right about now. Laissez les bon temps rouler!!!

Eight.

Oh, the birthday revelry almost kept me off the roads this morning but I managed to drag myself out around 8:30 this morning. Florida summer has arrived along with its trademark humidity. Still, white fluffy clouds floating in a deep blue sky make for beautiful scenery, not to mention the ospreys and water views as I turn around in Weedon Island Preserve. This makes my 8th workout this week. With any luck I'll make #9 tomorrow and have completed my first week of base building before half IM training begins in July.

With these past few months filled with lethargy or the long slow build back to tri-level fitness, I had forgotten the "need for speed". So many of my workouts have been dedicated to keeping it slow, don't get injured during the build, only a few 10 second pickups on the run, easy spins on the bike, keeping the HR in zone 1 or 2 that I forgot what it feels like to push it. Today, I let myself play. I've written about the "serene fatigue" that I get from workouts but there is something very cathartic about blood pumping, air gasping, muscle screaming speed. With my novice running skills, the only place I achieve satisfying speed is on my bike. Funny how I hated the bike when I started triathlon only to have it become a stronghold of peace, solace, and stress relief.

And, my almost 5 year old nephew said I was "cool" at my birthday party last night. Not a bad present.

Happy Birthday to me, Happy Birthday to me, Happy Birthday to me, Happy Birthday to me

On the eve of my 32nd birthday, I'm left wondering if my lifelong goal will disappear. I was never one of those people who had a perfect vision of the future. I knew I wanted to find someone to love and get married but I didn't have a definition of who he would be or the extact details of my wedding. My wedding was blast and I adore my doting husband. Both were important goals in my life. Their memory is drifting away. I wish I had blogged more of that experience.

Which is why I'm bloggin this now. Heck, I have problems remembering my 21st birthday. But tomorrow marks a change. A refocusing of life. For the next 5 months, there can be only one. In the great scheme of things, this is not end of the world. Other friends face much greater challenges in health or in raising a family. But my PhD has been a goal since I was in high school. I wanted to know what it would be like to reach the end of the education road. No more degrees to earn. Along the way I've learned that learning is what drives me. I don't want to get to the point where I know it all. That's why science has been a great fit. More questions arise from each answer. It intrigues me. However, the hum drum day to day politics of science are just as bad as any office stories from my corporate friends. It's too bad to know that a few bad choices and a little lack of guidance can snuff out a dream.

Sure, I could go to a different college. Starting over is a possiblity on paper. But to do it all over again, knowing what I know will happen. The core classes, comprehensive exams, other bullshit...I don't think I have it in me to start again. But a lot of fire remains to finish this battle.

Life is what happens while you're busy making other plans. So true.

Seven.

After the morning run and lunchtime swim, the next 3 days seem easy. There are ONLY 2 more workouts. Tomorrow is a rest day. YIPPEEE!

Seriously, the run went well. I had some motivation problems once I got out the door but I used the old Jeff Galloway trick: "just run for 5 minutes". One advantage I've noticed since graduating to simple running (rather than run/walk intervals) is that I can get lost in thought. Not that I design great plans for the day. Sometimes I do. Most runs, my mind takes a wandering walk as my body runs, drifting in between topics. Of course, when the time comes for 10 second pickups, the wandering stops but until then, there is time for renewal.

The swim passed without comment. Some arm fatigue, as on Tuesday, but nothing big. Easy laps with 2 rest intervals. I am more tired this week than last week. Part of the blame lies with the bad news of the week, part lies with the extra workouts. Which one reigns supreme? It's hard to tell. What I do know is that my workouts keep me sane. Period. And I don't workout unless I have a race planned. That's how my sick mind works.

In other news, the extension request letter for my doctorate is almost done. For better or for worse, I will send it in tomorrow. Several friends have offered advice and sympathy. For now, the Florida Challenge 1/2IM stays, everything else goes. Except the hubby and the dog. They live in the house, making it hard to ditch them. :)

Five.

It feels like six and seven, to be honest. There was yet another XL shipment at the store yesterday. I guess it counts as a weight workout but all that "lifting with my legs" leaves my left hamstring sore.

Yesterday held bad news on the dissertation front. The college has given me a Fall 2005 time limit for my dissertation. Given the deadlines for turning in manuscripts and defending, that gives me only 5 months to collect all my data, write the dissertation, defend it, and turn it in. Nearly impossible. Under the best of circumstances my data will not be finished until August.
This stresses me out to no end. Not a lot of sleep last night. However, all the extra workouts gave me a "serene fatigue" cushion to break my fall. My dearest friend and my husband were both amazed at my generally positive attitude. I credit that to the workouts.

Between the sleeplessness, stress, and general "siren pillow" syndrome, it felt like an anchor held me fast to the bed this morning. Maybe it took a little longer to wake up but I rode my bike, as scheduled. Sure, it was 30 easy minutes in zone 1 but that makes 5 out of 5 scheduled workouts for the week. Plus, I enjoy the summer mornings in Florida. Beautiful blue sky. Air so humid it feels like a living being. Kinda neat.

Today I work on sorting out my dissertation crisis. There is a chance I can get a semester extension. Not much extra time but a few months would make a big difference. The first step is to write a grovelling letter asking for more time. Then, I wait.
With a little love and luck, we will get by.

Four.

Another run and swim to round out the schedule. Given that I've almost worked out more in 2 days than the past week, I decided to scale back the run and swim. The run consisted of 30 minutes with 10, 10 second pickups in the middle rather than 6 or 7 1 minute sprints. For the swim, I took a break every 3 laps to keep my form clean. I can feel the extra workouts in my arms when I swim. The upper arm muscles burned a little during the last laps. Also, I feel serenely tired, if that makes any sense at all. It's a familiar feeling. Not bad. But it does make me tired by the end of the day.

So far so good.

Two.

Rather than plan a complicated ramp up program that would slowly build up to 9 workouts a week, I decided to jump in. This week call for 3 rides, 3 runs, and 3 swims. The sudden increase in training could be a problem. That is why I'm attempting to keep each workout easy. Last week I swam twice, ran twice and rode once. Those workouts will stay at the same intensity this week. However, I'm adding 2 recovery-style rides. Max 30 minutes, all zone 1 for aerobic intensity, spinning 90rpms in the small ring. One LSD style run for the weekend. All 3 swims will be 500yds, easy with no drills and one rest interval. Yeah, that still adds almost 2 extra hours of workouts to my training in one week but obsessing takes too much time away from other things.

Today's ride was very easy. I had to return home in order to rearrange the inner tube on the bike. It did not sit properly under the tire after fixing a flat last night. Deflate. Adjust. Reinflate. At least I made it home without flatting again. The swim was also low key. Go the distance. Two short rest intervals to fix the seal mask. Nothing over the top. I'm trying to build the habit of working out 9 times a week. Once that is established, the rest of the scheduling can fit around it.

I hope.

Two down. 7 to go.

Well I made it out onto the roads this morning despite another case of the Siren Pillow. While I'm too far behind to follow my training plan on Training Peaks, the idea of embedding short speed workouts into midweek runs seems to work for me. It gives each workout a purpose and splits up the 30 minutes into sections. Today is was 5, 1 minute runs getting my heart rate up. In between each pick up, I ran 1 minute of slow, easy jog. So far so good.

I've been seriously obsessing over my half IM training. Suddenly, it occurred to me that my training should start in June or July but I'm no where near the fitness level to start any of the beginner 1/2 IM programs on the web. Plus, I don't have time for the workouts that I see, even if I were working out 9 times a week plus strength training.

For a couple of days I considered dropping out but that's not an option. To bail on both races this year? Give up my half IM goal? No way. Plus, if I could train for a marathon in October, why not a 1/2 Ironman? My plan for now is to keep the midweek workouts at 30-45 minutes per workout. Long stuff on the weekends. My mind says that is not very much training time but when there are 2 workouts a day, 2-3 hours are dedicated to preparing for the workout, warming up, completing the workout, cooling down, and transitioning from workout to real life activities. If only the wine store would let me show up nasty and sweaty from a workout. Maybe my labmates wouldn't mind. :-)

Every person balances life, family, work, and their pursuit of happiness. General athletes more so. Triathletes especially so. I mean, my "normal" friends think 6 workouts a week is doing pretty darn good. And it is. But here I am thinking "6 workouts? That's it? That's barely enough for a sprint if you include weight training". Obviously, I have a problem.

Hi, I'm Linae and I'm a triathlete.

Ah, the siren call of the pillow. Once my brain realized there were no clean clothes for running, all willpower faded away into a light snore. Imagine my shock when I awoke at 8AM. ACK! It's late. Barely enough time to shower, eat, feed the zoo, and run out the door. At least I remembered lunch.

Oh well. Tomorrow I'll run a short AM route to make up for today's extra rest. There are plenty of boxes to move at the part-time job so it's not exactly a rest day.

Last semester, I got a locker at the university gym as a way to encourage my weight workouts. It worked for a while. Perhaps I will switch my locker to a pool as a way to encourage my swimming. With a 1/2 IM swimming looking me in the face, I need all the encouragement I can get.

Swim swim swim.

After the nutritional carnage of our trip to St. Augustine, I didn't know if my workout motivation would remain. No worries. While it's not perfect, I swam 500yds today and ran 2 miles yesterday. I'm focusing on consistency rather than distance. I had a huge training program for a 10 mile race underway before I got sick and lost all motivation. Now it's too late to hop back on the program, making it a tad difficult to train. The Florida Challenge 1/2 IM looms out in October. That training plan starts in July, giving me a couple of months to wander aimlessly in the world of fitness. The plan is to ramp up training until I'm swimming, biking and running 3 times a week, even if it's just 30 minute workouts. Now, how to get there is another story. And if I could lose 10 pounds along the way, fantastic.

The Artful Dodger


St. Augustine, FL. 1734. The blistering sun chases travelers and sailors alike inside the stone Taberna del Gallo. Lucky ones find refuge near the cool walls. Others move outside under the trees. Lack of space forces uneasy strangers together, sitting on any available surface. Mead and brew flow generously, cooling the palate and enhancing a friendly detente between these unlikely companions. As the sun sets, a trio of old salts sing sea shanties, joined by the boisterous choir of patrons inside the tavern...

His name is Arthur. Art by his own admission. His mates call him "Artful Dodger", a monicker, Art claims, bestowed on him following a series of youthful mishaps. Merely 30 years old, the uneasy travelers wonder how much time has passed since these "mishaps". Dodger's companions seem equally unsettled by the presence of these gypsies? Pilgrims?

Of course there was a wine delivery yesterday.

We had 2: large and XXL. In fact, the truck driver said the XXL was probably close to 9000lbs of wine. Imagine our dismay when we discovered that this particular truck had no palette lift. We had to unload each box from the back of the trailer rather than rolling the palette to the back door. So much for a rest day. Oh yeah, and it arrived at 6pm. 1 hour before the shop closes. Oh well.

Today will be another attempt at a rest day, although, all the boxes we moved in yesterday have to be put away today. Semi-rest day. Today's run has been rescheduled for tomorrow. Saturday will be an easy morning ride. Sunday I'll run. Monday will be a rest day. So far there are no protests from the old shoulders, hamstrings or knees. I'll try to take things easy the next 2 weeks in order to get all the parts back in the training groove.

Even these low-key workouts improve my mood. I sleep better and handle life's little stresses with a little more style than usual.

Most of my entries involve my workouts or other ramblings. Today, I'm feeling a bit panicked. Yet another literature search revealed dozens of new papers. And a book. I feel I should read them all. Changing topics and taxa for my dissertation has left me out of sorts and stressed. I spent 18 years of my life becoming an "newbie" expert in one field only to have it taken away. The laboratory work is the same but the amount of research available on fish is astounding compared to marine mammals. Of course, if you tried having 10 dolphins in a tank, exposing them to toxic metals, then sacrificing them to see how much of the metal was absorbed, people might protest. But you can do it with fish. You can do lots of experiments with fish. Thousands of them. With different controls, experimental conditions, metals, interactions of metals, species of metals....I'm overwhelmed. Before I can do something "new" for my PhD, I have to know what has come before. And, I get no extra time to finish my dissertation. Time limits are time limits. An extension will go only so far.

When not panicked, I live with feelings of extreme stress and inadequacy. Not working hard enough, long enough, I'll never finish. This can lead to sleeplessness where I wake up at 2 am, mind racing. Nothing like staring at a dark ceiling for 2 hours in the middle of the night. Sometimes I get so worked up over all the things that think I should do that I can't work. And when that happens, I get nothing done which makes me more stressed...it's a viscious cycle.

Hard, long workouts are one of my few breaks. Right now my body is not ready for that kind of exertion, so it's kind of hard to manage the stress. Sure, I do yoga, go for walks, make my short 30-45 minute workouts but they don't provide the absolute focus (and solace) I find during a long run or group ride with the next-fasted group. It's so peaceful, so free.

Bleah. Apparently, I promised one of my riding partners that I would ride Tuesday night. It was tough because I had already run and mowed the lawn yesterday. Sure, during peak training times 2 hours of workouts are nothing but I'm not at the peak of training. I'm just coming back to 3-5 workouts per week. But, I made it. 45 minutes almost averaging 16mph. That's a little faster than my easy pace but such is life.

Today is a rest day. No working out unless we get a shipment in at the wine store.

Woohoo! I ran 2 miles AND mowed the lawn before heading into the lab. OK, I was a little late getting in but I made my workout and the yard looks like a yard and less like a meadow. And I packed a relatively healthy lunch. Keeping on the path.

Two workouts in three days sure makes me feel better. I've felt like such a slacker. These past few weeks held no motivation for school, no desire to workout, absolute failure in eating healthy foods...just a terrible funk. Working out provides a natural, positive focus for my thoughts. It makes everything seem better. It should never be hard to workout. Well, in a perfect world anyway.

Saturday, a few friends rode with me on an easy morning spin. This morning's walk motivated me to bring my swim bag to school. Sure enough, a fun, short swim filled in my lunch hour. It was so good to be outside. Now, if only I can keep up the spirit for the next 6 months.

:-)

Another beautiful day in Florida. I am in the lab.

Not that I begrudge my dissertation. Heaven knows it will soak up all the time I have. It needs and deserves that time. Yet, I'd still like to sit out under a tree with a cold glass of ice tea or something.

Today was a small victory because I rode my bike. Haven't worked out in weeks. This is a nice change. The key will be to keep my one day momentum going. :-) Only 6 months to the Florida Challenge 1/2 Ironman Distance race. Maybe I'll get my act together this time.

Holly is in my thoughts and prayers this morning.

My life will be rather mundane today as I work out a way to move samples from my lab to the processing area across the way in the pouring rain. No running or swimming today. I'm a lightning wimp and the pool will be closed as well.

Looking for a little motivation to get started today...

This past week I've felt rather sorry for myself. After visiting my dermatologist today and reading some email, it's clear that I am very, very lucky.

Here is the address for a fellow triathlete's blog: http://triandbehappy.blogspot.com/

Holly can use all the support she can get. GO HOLLY!!!!